DEGREE 01
B.S. in Repetitive Fuckery
Advanced Studies in Doing This Shit Again
Why the fuck do I keep ending up here?
Recurring patterns · rescue missions · institutional déjà vu
Available field equipment
THE WTF UNIVERSITY · UNOFFICIAL ACADEMIC RECORDS
The Shituational Degree Catalog
What the fuck are you majoring in?
Life experience is the coursework. The bullshit is the assigned reading. Graduation is not guaranteed.
Satirical, unofficial qualifications. No enrollment, accreditation, or student loans involved.
DEGREE 02
B.A. in Invisible Fuckery
Unrecognized Human Contributions
Why the fuck does nobody see what I’m carrying?
Invisible labor · emotional obligations · unacknowledged responsibility
Available field equipment
DEGREE 03
B.S. in Applied Bullshit Detection
Advanced Studies in Who the Fuck to Believe
How the fuck do I know who’s full of shit?
Manufactured certainty · questionable expertise · evidence inspection
Available field equipment
DEGREE 04
B.A. in Compulsory Humaning
Obligations, Expectations & Other People’s Fucking Plans
Whose fucking life am I living?
Inherited expectations · assigned roles · competing commitments
Available field equipment
DEGREE 05
B.S. in Shituational Navigation
Advanced Studies in Being Fucking Stuck
Why the fuck can’t I get from here to there?
Decision paralysis · competing constraints · moving targets
WTFU · OFFICE OF UNREQUESTED ENROLLMENT
Declare your fuckery
Pick one major and, optionally, one minor. No applications. No prerequisites. Life handled admission.
THE WTF UNIVERSITY · UNOFFICIAL ACADEMIC RECORD
Declared major: Not yet declared
Declared minor: None
Current thesis: Pending identification of the fuckery.
Enrollment status: Life apparently decided for you.
Satire only · Not an academic credential